14 September 2016

Hello to myself

Wow you're 24 now. Can't believe how fast it was. Anyway may this age of yours bring more character in you, wiser in decision making and make you way fun than before. Appreciate your loved ones and be positive towards all of the hardship that you're going through in the future. Stay healthy and never lose your smile.

Mission

By next year i'm going to Japan, alone or not alone i will go there and no one will be able to stop me! 

Afraid

I feel afraid with a lot of things nowadays. I'm afraid of loneliness, what's going to happen right now and to the future. I don't want to live alone like both of my grandmothers. I've seen it, living alone without your children around you while you're happy or by the time you need them the most. It's definitely sad to see how they died without anyone besides them. But at the same time i'm afraid to get married, conceive my own child, fight over stupid things, share everything and sacrificing your whole life. The responsibilities are too much for me to handle. 

Well i guess maybe only now i think this way. Maybe in the future i might change my perception. I hope...

24 March 2016

I don't know why do i keep thinking of you. You kept appearing in my mind. I guess i miss talking to you or i'm still not used to not talking to you. I don't know.

My life is getting better now. I got new job with good salary. I got my family and best friends who are always with me. Rubs just delivered a baby boy named Auf Raed. Alyaa is still struggling to finish her degree. Although I rarely meet both of my partayy peeps, they're still close to my heart. The beginning of 2016 are great well at least for now. I planned to take Japanese language class and go to Japan by next year. With who? Well i don't really plan to go with anyone and i don't mind going alone as well. I still got few goals to achieve. Can't wait to feel the joy ticking my list of goals. 

Till then,

ssk

To A Person I Once Loved

I lost count when was the day i stop stalking you through facebook. I found it's no use for me to keep stalking you since i'm the one who dumped you plus you already deleted me from your friends list. 

It was hard for me to move on but i know i have to since it's for my own good and i never feel regret for i've done.

I love you i still do, it's just that i believe that you don't deserve me since i'm not really your dream girl who can always listen to everything that you wanted me to do. I really hope you can find someone way better than me.

I'm sorry that i broke your heart and for everything especially during 10 months we have been together. You're one incredible man, you taught me a lot of things and for that i appreciate it so much.

Thank you and may you find the one who will love you more than anything in this world.

1 January 2016

2015 was the year that i learned how to make a decision for myself, being matured and patience.

To the people i love the most:

My family has been supportive in most of the things that i did last year. I truly love them as they will never be replaced

To my very best friends: 

My friends are always with me. Helping me with almost everything. Always come up with great ideas. Last year was the year that we've gone our first trip together. The thing that i remember the most is when they wanted to surprise me with a cake on my birthday and i wasn't even home yet. They went looking for me afraid that something might happen to me. I was so touched by their effort. I can never ask for a better friends than you guys.

To MKN: 

In early of last year, i met a very good man who loves me dearly and promise to marry me and make me the happiest woman i can ever be. I'm grateful and thankful because i've never meet this kind of guy before who's not taking me for granted. But then things don't work out, we had a fight and i can't be the way he wanted me to be so i decided to call it off. I guess i need to reflect myself. Maybe i'm not ready for this, for one step ahead.   

The journey that i had last year taught me a lot of things especially about myself. There was happiness, laugh, sadness, disappointment, love and many more. I'm hoping that 2016 may be a good year for me to achieve greater things in life. I wish all the best to those who are still with me as well as who doesn't. Thank you and have a bright future ahead.

So....

Hello 2016 🎈

20 November 2015

1. So what happened within this month?

Well not much lately. I'm jobless, stayed home like usual. So i decided to distract myself by painting the house. Got few interview and i rejected 2 positions. Still receive few but i'm still considering. 

2. So how are you?

I'm good. Healthy as a horse, well physically. Mentally? I'm still working out. I sometimes feel sad and regret but at the same time i feel relieved and happy. I don't know what's wrong with me. I guess i'm just too unpredictable.